Somethings Missing
by jersey09
Summary: "We're in the same art class and I'm awesome, but you're not and you're failing and you need help so I guess I'll tutor you" AU
1. Chapter 1

/ This is my first story I've published so any and all feedback is appreciated. The chapters are pretty short, so I will try to update as often as possible. Thank you so much for reading, enjoy!

PS. I sadly don't own Newsies :(

As stroke after stroke crossed the once blank canvas, a bold sunset quickly transformed from an image in the young man's mind to a remarkable piece of art. The warm magenta for the love he had for his brothers. Red for the dull anger that never leaves. A soft yellow for the everlasting compassion he would never admit he has. The light blue from the sky that was fading teased around the edges. A reminder that happiness only lasts for so long. Lastly, there's the black shadows of the clouds. This represents the memories from his past, that while he tries and tries, he can never seem to truly rid himself of. To any onlooker, it is merely a beautiful painting. To the artist from which it came, it is his deepest secrets and strongest passions on display for all to see.

Stepping back to reflect on his work, Jack glanced around the art room. His eyes landed on a short, blond kid a few eisels down. Unlike the other students, he was sitting on a stool. As Jack's eyes traveled from the boy to his canvas, he noticed it too was different than all the others. It was blank.

 _Brrrrrriiiinnnngggg!_ The bell rang signifying the end of the period. All around him, Jack's classmates stampeded to their freedom, the freedom that only lasts for five minutes before another torture starts. Slower than the rest, Jack scrubbed his tie-dye hands with little success of cleaning the stains. Art has invariably been the only way Jack could express himself. Even when the world seems to slam every existing door in his face, he can always put some pigments on a piece of fabric and call it art. Deep in his thoughts of a better life, Jack didn't notice the kid come up behind him.

"I like your painting," the blond mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper.

Startled, Jack whipped around. "What?" He recognized the boy from earlier. He was the one with the blank canvas.

"Oh, um. I-I saw your painting. I just, I thought it looked good. I mean it was better than good, I uh, I liked it."

"Thanks." Jack paused awkwardly. With anyone else he would complement their picture too, even though they were never as good as his. He couldn't exactly use that trick this time. "The name's Jack." Had he seen the boy before? Yes. Did he have a clue what his name was? Absolutely not. "Sorry, what's your name again?"

This was his chance to start over. The tall brunette in front of him didn't even know his name. He didn't know his broken pieces and missing parts. But for some reason he just couldn't lie to Jack. "Crutchie. We had gym together last semester." Crutchie prepared to dodge the inevitable questions.

"Crutchie?" Of course Jack was curious, but he saw the kid draw in a breath to explain. He knew it couldn't have been the first time he'd been asked. "Oh yeah, I remember you. You sat on the bench a lot…" Jack remembered that he also missed a lot of school days. _I'm pretty sure I saw him on crutches at some point now that I think about it_ , Jack thought. So much for avoiding the topic.

A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. Jack had tried, and Crutchie appreciated it. "I better get to class," he paused, "and thanks." With that he hurried to his next class.

Jack watched him leave. He had the gait of someone trying to hide a limp. The walk of a person who had to consciously put one foot in front of the other. _Crutchie_ , the name repeated over and over in Jack's head.


	2. Chapter 2

/ Thank you to y'all who reviewed the first chapter, it means a lot to me. I know the length of the chapters is short, so I am planning on updating every other day. I hope you guys are having a wonderful week. Please read, review, and enjoy!

The next day in art, Jack couldn't focus on one single project. His hand doodled absentmindedly on a piece of scrap paper as he stared at Crutchie. He watched as the boy picked up and put down various supplies. With the majority of class over, Crutchie finally settled on pastels. When the bell rang, his canvas was still blank. Jack packed up and walked over to him.

"Hey, Crutchie," Jack started.

Crutchies eyes widened slightly as he recognized the voice. He casually moved in front of the empty picture. "Jack! Um, hi. What's up?"

"I saw-noticed, um. Yesterday it...and today… Your, uh." Jack struggled with finding the right words. He didn't want to embarrass the kid. "I noticed your canvas was blank yesterday and again today," he began hesitantly.

"Oh, yeah. I'm just not good at art. It's nothing really." Heat rose to his cheeks and he turned red. The best artist he'd ever seen was talking to him about his piece, or lack thereof.

Jack took a step forward. "Here, I can put up the pastels for you." Another step forward. "It's ok to not be good, ya know." As he reached for the unused crayons, Crutchie took a quick step backwards. His right foot tripped on air and he tumbled into the wooden stool. The impact caused the eisele's leg to give out, falling on top of the pile of wood and limbs.

"Crutch!"Jack immediately hoisted the not-exactly-light wooden structures off of the boy. As he lay curled with his arms over his head, Jack realized for the first time how frail he actually was. "Crutch, are you a'ight?"

"Please, just leave. Please," Crutchie begged to the older boy, his eyes still squeezed shut.

"Look, I'm not leaving ya. I don't know your history, but you're safe with me." He knelt and assisted Crutchie to his feet. Jack noticed how he favored his left leg and shied away from contact. "Crutchie, how about you come over to my place after school tomorrow. I can help you with your art, if that's alright with you."

Crutchie made eye contact with Jack. Tears blurred his vision as they threatened to spill down his freckled cheeks. Jack's gaze saw right through the tears, though. Past the ocean held back only by Crutchie's will, Jack saw himself reflected in the light brown eyes. He saw a young Jack Kelly, unable to express himself, emotions trapped behind a locked door, broken from abuse. _Abuse, abuse, abuse_. The horrendous word echoed. _Abuse, abuse, abuse._ A word that broke people. _Abuse, abuse, abuse._ A word that nobody deserved. Crutchie left without another word, but Jack knew he would show up the next day. He knew that he was the one person the kid trusted. The way Race had been for him. The way Spot had been for Race.


	3. Chapter 3

/ Y'all, I started writing this story February 1st. Almost exactly seven months ago. I think that writers subconsciously find themselves writing stories that they need to read. Even if it is buried underneath other characters and a world like Newsies. Seven months into this project and I finally realized what I had written. I realized what aspect of this story I needed to hear myself. For me, the story is about someone who feels broken and who feels like they have to hide what hurts being helped by a loyal friend who is always there for them. I had the person who I could talk to about anything and we were inseparable. This year we are going to different schools and honestly I'm terrified not to be with her. I went to her with everything- the good, the bad, and the ugly- and what we had was special. I'm sorry I am dumping all this onto you, the reader, but I feel like when an author connects deeper into a story, it makes it so much more vulnerable and it can hit home with a lot of people. Thank you to all who have read and/or reviewed, please enjoy the big reveal!

After the longest Tuesday of his life, Crutchie met Jack in the empty art room. The room that had, in just a few short days, become their sanctuary. He silently followed Jack out the back door.

"Are you sure we should be doing this?" a nervous Crutchie asked.

"Bro, you're just hanging at my place for a bit. We're not doing anything wrong. Nobody is gonna find out. I promise." Crutchie didn't seem convinced, but he took any opportunity to get out of the house.

"Where is 'your place' anyways?" They had been walking for a bit now, and were leaving the suburbs into a darker part of the city. Crutchie never went this far from home, always making sure he could sneak back through his bedroom window in a moment's notice.

"Well, I guess it's not really _my_ place. It's kind of shared, but I've got my own spot." As the duo turned the corner, a large lodging house came into view. Crutchie stopped cold. He'd heard stories about places like this. Thirty kids in one building. He nearly had a panic attack meeting Jack, the thought of that many boys- no, triggers- was terrifying. "I need to warn ya, there's a lot of us. They won't mess with us, but don't be anxious. They's my brothers, just like you." A sad smile graced Crutchie's face. Jack had his back. He would be ok.

Jogging up the few steps to the main entrance, Jack waited for Crutchie at the top. The second boy took his time, using the handrail excessively to make it to the landing. Jack poked his head in the door. "Newsies, I'm here! Y'all know where I'm at. Holler if you need me! Get your homework done before any rounds of cards. Yes, I am singling you out Race." Crutchie snickered at how mature the boy was. "What? Someone has to keep them in line," Jack stated matter-of-factly.

"No, you do your thing. So, are we going in there?" Crutchie started fidgeting again.

"No, no. I try to stay out of that chaos and loudness. Are you ok to make it up to the roof?" Jack glanced down at the kid's leg. So quick, you could almost miss it.

"I'll survive."

The last thing Jack wanted was to hurt the kid more than he obviously was. "Ya sure? Cause it's-"

"I'll make it. Can we just not talk about it?"

"Ok."

Jack and Crutchie started up the countless flights of stairs. Each step made the old, metal structure shake and creak beneath their weight. Jack was surprised at how in-shape Crutchie was. He was slower moving, dragging along a hidden burden, but he wasn't even out of breath when they came upon the ladder. Crutchie looked up. _Almost there_ , he thought. "Let's do it."

Crutchie went first, not wanting to look like he needed assistance. Jack easily picked up on that, but he missed the second reason Crutch went first. He found comfort in knowing Jack was behind him should he fall.

Left foot up. Stand. Right foot up. One rung down.

Left foot up. Stand. Right foot up. Two rungs down.

Left foot up. Stand. Right foot up. Three rungs down.

Left foot up. Stand.

 _Oh, no._ A rusty bolt sticking out of the ladder caught Crutchie's pant leg, hiking it up.

"Here, I got it." Jack bent down to help his friend when his hand brushed against his leg. Jack resisted the urge to jerk back. Rather than feeling flesh and muscle, his hand had collided with nothing, then cool metal. He freed Crutchie and they finished climbing in silence.

Crutchie sat down on the edge with his legs dangling above the city below. "I suppose you want to know about it now. How it happened? What's it like?"

"Only when you're ready to share." Jack sat down next to Crutchie. They locked eyes. "When were you going to tell me?" Crutchie looked away. "When were you going to stop hiding it?"

"I'm sorry. I knew you'd find out eventually, I just couldn't bring myself to have my identity consumed by it. I wasn't ready to just be the kid who was missing a leg."

"You are so much more than that, Crutch. You are light, you are kindness, you are your smile that can illuminate a room. Don't ever reduce yourself to one label. If people do that, they don't deserve to be around you."


	4. Chapter 4

/ Hey y'all I really like this chapter so I'm posting a whole like 4 hours early, you're welcome. Thanks of course for reading and reviewing. Next chapter I'm trying something new and respond to all the reviews individually, so please review the story or just ask a question to get to know me. Love you guys, keep being yourselves!

Jack stood up. "Ok! I said you could come over to be tutored in art. I keep to my word." Crutchie let out a slow and exaggerated groan. Jack scoffed. " _How dare you?_ Art is the greatest anything of all time! Show some respect!" He threw a playful punch at Crutchie's arm. The kid flinched. Jack made a mental note to be more controlled in the future, but continued on with the act. "Coming from arguably the best artist in Manhattan, the problem isn't your hands, it's your head."

Crutchie couldn't decide if Jack had gone mad or if he believed the words coming out of his mouth. "You've lost me. What do ya want, me to study? Be your apprentice? The issue is that I just suck at art. Nothing more than that. Some people just aren't as good as you."

"That's the thing. You think art relies on the quality of a canvas when you are finished. With you, you just need to put _something_ on the eisl. Crutchie, the reason I'm good at art is because I take from my past...my pain and I express it through paints and pastels and pencils and graphite and watercolors. Sometimes it's a place, other times it's just lines and colors."

Jack's sunset suddenly became clearer. Crutchie thought back to the name of the painting. "Santa Fe?"

"Santa Fe."

"You have so much built up. So much that you've shoved down deep inside of you that you can't reach to that place of feeling and emotions to create art. I'm not asking you to revisit your past. I would never. But, I know that you remember what it felt like." Jack placed a gentle hand on Crutchie's chin, forcing him to look up and meet his gaze. "It's ok. You will be ok. _We_ will be ok. I'm here for you."

Crutchie just nodded. No words could express what he was feeling in that moment. He just nodded and cried. He no longer cared about who saw him because Jack was right. Jack placed a stump of a pencil in the kid's hand.

Hesitantly, Crutchie placed the tip of the pencil on a scrap sheet of paper. "Don't think. Just let it all out."

Strokes of graphite crossed the smudged scrap of paper. An image that neither boy had even known existed appeared in front of them. At first the lines were hesitant, light and shaky. Slowly they changed and got bolder, harsher, angrier. The lines that emerged didn't seem like they could come from someone so seemingly innocent and fragile. They were dark and the lead crumbled when he pressed down. The pencil threatened to break through the piece of paper. His hand smeared the dust so looking back the picture it was different than originally. A tear fell and blotched the ink so it was distorted and swirling in the water. The pencil fell from Crutchie's hand and clanged against the metal floor. In one fluent movement he turned into Jack's awaiting arms and was embraced tighter and with more love than ever before. For what Crutchie had drawn was not a person or a place or anything physical. He had drawn his heart. The good, the bad, and the ugly. The parts he wished he could forget and the times that kept him going. It was a masterpiece of expression.

"I'm _so_ proud of you. I'm glad you came. I should probably get back to the boys so they don't tear eachother apart, though. I'll see you at school tomorrow?"

A look of fear and pain washed over Crutchie's face. "Yeah, I guess. See ya." He started the long descent back to civilization. The stars got further away and the dark alleys and hooded figures got closer.


	5. Chapter 5

/ Guys I'm really sorry for not updating last night I had plans and completely forgot. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again.

SomedayonBroadway- Thank you as always for your reviews, it means so much to me that you are enjoying my story!

brighteyes421- Aaahhh thank you thank you thank you! Your review gave me chills, I appreciate it so much!

Thank you to Les Phansie and Music on the Moon for reviewing past chapters and also to everyone who has read the story. Enjoy this little nugget of a chapter!:)

Days passed with no sign of Crutchie. Jack had been counting the hours since he last saw him and glanced out the door every ten minutes. The day was Friday. Every other kid chattered endlessly of what they were doing that weekend, but Jack felt like he may break down if he had to go a whole weekend with no way to contact Crutchie. When Jack arrived late to art class and refused to meet anyone in the eye, people knew something was up. He instinctively glanced to Crutchie's long since abandoned stool. Except, it wasn't abandoned. Sitting, no, collapsed on top of it was a frail crip who was nothing but skin and bones. He wouldn't even be identifiable if it weren't for those piercing, light brown eyes. Crutchie, no. Jack's breath caught. Rage welled up from deep inside of him. No. I have to help him first, Jack thought. Clenching his jaw to conceal his fury, Jack made his way over to Crutchie. "Crutchie? Hey man, it's me." Jack was careful not to touch the kid.

Crutchie tried not to flinch. He knew Jack wouldn't hurt him, but after what he'd just been through, it was hard not to. His lip trembled.

Jack kneeled down and looked up at Crutch. As he did so, he noticed the majority of his class staring at the two boys. With one ice cold stare, everyone knew to mind their own business from that point on. "I'm here. Hey, look at me, we're ok. I'm not going anywhere, remember?."

"It hurt so bad. I got home late and and he had already had a case of beer… I tried to sneak in my window but he caught me and I just I didn't I couldn't stop it Jack it hurt so bad."

"Shhhhhhh, I know, I know. Just listen to my voice. Focus on my voice. I'm just gonna talk, a'ight. I'm gonna talk and you just listen. So, so there's this place called Santa Fe. It's out west, way out there. And in Santa Fe they don't care where you came from. No, no they welcome everyone and everyone is loved. The stars are out every night and there ain't a fire escape in sight for miles and miles. They even got these horses, Palominos, see I'm gonna ride one once I get there. Ok? In fact, we both are. Yep, we are gonna make there on our own. No more big cities, no sir, just small towns and wide open plains. There you won't have to hide nothin'. Out west, people aren't defined by their limits, but by their possibilities. And the moon, oh, the moon. It's the biggest and brightest thing you ever seen. We'll be there. Santa Fe."

Jack could talk all he wanted. He could calm the kid down and run his mouth but it will never undo the fact that he is hurt and there's no way for him to protect Crutchie. This is because of me. Jack had said not to worry, that everything would be alright and look where it got them. He wanted to scream.


	6. Chapter 6

/ Guys, thanks for reading and reviewing! I appreciate it so much. To everyone who reads this chapter, go rewatch Newsies on Netflix. I don't have a reason for telling y'all this, but I just feel like sometimes it feels good to sing along and quote something you love endlessly. Alright, I know y'all wanted it, so here is some character dialogue between characters I love as much as the next Fansie. Enjoy!

SomedayonBroadway: Thank you as always, I love breaking hearts. ;)

brightens421: The visual you described is so perfect for that scene, thank you for sharing and helping me fix my mistake.

Les Phansie: I literally, audibly laughed at your review. I feel you, Crutchie is my baby and I love him so much.

"Race, it was terrible. He could barely hold himself up he-he looked awful and it was my fault."

"How old is 'e?" Race, the 16 or 17 year old kid (no one knew for certain, it varied from day to day), tried to find reason in Jack who was on the verge of doing something stupid.

"He's two grades down so about 15."

"Jack, think about where you were when you was 15. I know it's horrible, no one should have to go through this. But you was his age when-"

"I here ya." Jack lay his head on the younger boy's outstretched legs and Race subsequently started running his fingers through his brother's hair. They were on Race's bunk; the fire escape just reminded Jack of his helplessness for Crutchie. Opening up was hard, even with Race, but Jack didn't understand what else he could do.

"When it happened to ya, I didn't run off trying to fix things out of my pow'r. Same with Spot when I went through it"

"Uh, yeah he did." It ended up with bruises and black eyes for both boys. Jack recalled getting snow from outside to put on Race's back.

"Ok he did but you remember how it only made things worse. Look, you're the one who always has the answers, so I know it's hard but 'e'll be ok."

"Can I sleep with ya tonight?" This wasn't an odd occurrence for the younger kids, but for the fearless Jack Kelly to ask was frightening to both of them.

"Jack of course."

"But this stays between us." Jack never was this vulnerable. He loved all his brothers, but being the oldest he was the one people asked to sleep with. He was the one to answer the hard questions and deal with the demons.

Jack gave up sleeping restful nights a long time ago, but when his eyes slid shut images of his father and the refuge would come to mind. That night was no exception, except now Crutchie was there too. Broken, bleeding, and bruised, but there. For Race, the extra presence in his bed was welcome. It brought back memories of his past, not that he ever talked about it. At least for one night, his nightmares ceased and the sirens weren't so bad.


	7. Chapter 7

/ Not much to say for this one. The next update may take a little longer because I am currently at a soccer tournament. I hope y'all enjoy this chapter!

As time passed, Jack refused to forgive himself. Crutchie, of course, never blamed him for anything, constantly reminding him that it was not is fault. It didn't change a thing. Jack sank deeper and deeper into the grave he was digging for himself. If there was anything that could pull him out, it would be that smile that could light up a room.

Although he still ached from time to time, Crutchie had mostly healed from the most recent beating. "Hey Jack! Look what I made! Good, huh?" Crutchie showed off his newest piece of art, depicting a wide open field, flooded with moonlight. Santa Fe wasn't Crutchie's dream. It wasn't the hope that kept him going. Jack was. And if Jack broke, if the sparkle faded from his eye, the lives of countless young boys who look up to him would be changed for worse.

Jack didn't show off his abstract piece. It was yet another creation centered around darkness and dark colors. The picture was never muddled, though, because in Jack's mind the images were still as clear as air.

"That's great Crutch. Hey, where are you going after school today?" Jack asked this everyday and Crutchie thought he understood why. The guy was worried. It was understandable.

"I'm gonna hang out at the deli 'til 7ish then head home and go to bed. Jack, it's been two weeks. I know you've sent some of your boys to look after me. I see them outside of the windows and on my street. And I'm not gonna lie, sometimes it's comforting, but I need you to trust me."

"I trust you fine. It's your old man I don't trust."

"I'm not a little kid I-"

"Yes, you are!" Jack struggled to keep his voice from yelling. "Look, when I was your age if I had someone lookin' after me…" His breath hitched.

"Jack…"

Jack resumed quieter, "...Maybe it wouldn'ta hurt so bad." Goosebumps raced up Crutchie's arms. "What do ya need? Tell me and I'll be there. I'm just- I'm trying as best as I can."

"Just provide an escape. With you always concerned it's like I don't have anywhere to breathe. Try to let things be normal, even if you're just pretending. Please."

Jack nodded. This experience is different for everyone. While he could understand the pain and feeling, what Crutchie needed was different than what Jack had. "Ok. I'm still gonna try to protect you. I couldn't just leave you alone and forget about it, but I get it."

"Santa Fe?"

"Santa Fe."

Jack needed Santa Fe. Who knows if he would've even made it without that magical place? Crutchie got that. A realization washed over Jack. _I'm his Santa Fe. His escape, his relief. I can't let him down on this. Not again._ At that moment Jack made a vow. No matter what, he would be there for Crutchie, whatever that may entail. "Tomorrow? After school?"

"Yeah, that- that'd be perfect." Crutchie sighed a sigh of relief. Slowly, he hoped he might lower Jack's walls back down, even just a bit. Sometimes helping someone else can make you feel better when in reality you're the one who needs the kind words. Often people find themselves saying the comforting words to others that they need to be told.


	8. Chapter 8

/ Thank you guys for being so patient with this update! Honestly, I have no idea how much time the next few updates will take. For now we'll plan on a week, but it may be more or less. In this next chapter, you get to learn a bit about my versions of Jack and Crutchie (and a bit about me). I enjoyed writing this and I hope y'all enjoy it too!

On a personal note, please be sending thoughts and prayers. I have family who are in the direct path of hurricane Florence, and many friends and family of mine are being impacted. This goes out to anyone, if there are any supplies, food, or water that you can donate, I speak on behalf of countless communities when I say _please_ give what you can. Thank you.

Jack and Crutchie wandered the streets of New York in the afternoon heat, taking in the city of misfits and outcasts they called their own. They walked slow, with no true destination in mind. It was quiet, an unusual occurrence in their city. Crutchie broke the precious silence. "I used to be quite the track star."

Jack stopped walking. "What? Wait, _really?"_

"Yup."

"Where is this coming from?" Other than the dark, family stuff that they confided in eachother with when they were alone, Jack realised he didn't know much about the kid's ordinary life.

"I just want to get to know you better. Some counseling pamphlet said that if you share something about yourself, then the other person will open up." Jack gave him a look that read, _Are you serious? Please tell me you're not serious._ "Dude, I know what that look means… And I'm dead serious. I went to like one session at school with this lady. I don't remember her name, but she had red hair and had, like, OCD or something. She was nice and all, but I got scared that she would find out what was really going on and alert my 'guardian'. I ended up saying I wanted to make friends- Yes, I know, but it was the first thing I thought of…"

"That cover up was possibly the saddest thing I've ever heard." Jack laughed, covering his face as he rolled his eyes. "But, I know what ya mean. If adults find out about our type of situation they think they can magically fix it. I remember when one of my teachers found out about me. I couldn't sleep on my stomach for the next two weeks after what that punishment did to my ribs."

Crutchie stared at the ground, his cheeks flushed from embarrassment.

Jack spoke. "I'm part of the ASL club at our school. We go out and sign for churches and plays and stuff."

Crutchie's face lit up. "Awwww Jack that's so cool. Why did ya start doing the club?"

"The house has a couple of deaf and mute kids from various backgrounds. I wanted to make sure the kids didn't feel left out of our schemes so I learned ASL and taught some to the other boys. I made a requirement that every boy has to know basic signing. Everyone must be able to communicate with everyone, and no one gets left out. I really liked the community, so now I kinda just help out wherever I can."

The way Jack opened up and was so confident about the other aspects of his life inspired Crutchie. "Wow, I wish I could do stuff like that again."

"You _will_ be able to do things thing in your life, however permanent it may seem, will pass. It always does."

"The boys, at the house, they's really your life, ain't they?" Crutchie wasn't jealous at all; Jack's love for the boys truly warmed his heart.

"Yeah. I'll always have my Santa Fe, but they got a special place in my heart. Right next to you." Jack smiled warmly at Crutchie as the blond blushed an even deeper shade of pink.

Jack's phone buzzed silently in his back pocket. It was the alarm he set for 5:00 reminding him to grab a bite to eat, and then start making their way to Crutchie's house so they'd get back before the man did. It worked fine. After stopping at the deli, they were outside Crutchie's window by 6:20. Jack never told Crutch about the alarm; it was his private way of coping with the anxiety he felt about being out late with his brother.

"I'll see ya on Monday, kid. Remember, if anything gets too rough-"

"Get out, find you. I remember. Thanks and I'll see ya later!" He smiled one of his signatures.

"Love ya," Jack shouted as he climbed down the flight of stairs outside the window.

Crutchie's eyes welled up just enough for him to notice. He couldn't remember the last time someone had said that to him.


	9. Chapter 9

First, let me just say thank you so much for sending prayers. My grandparents, great grandfather, and other family were in the direct path of the hurricane. My grandparents just recently got back to their house and regained power. There isn't too much severe damage and they were truly lucky. My great-grandfather's house has completely flooded and Topsail Island (along with many other islands and beaches) is still completely devastated. Please continue keeping my family and all the other victims of the hurricane in your prayers. Thank you.

brighteyes421 and SomedayonBroadway thank you for consistently reviewing every chapter, I'm glad y'all have been enjoying this. I wrote this chapter in less than an hour based on one paragraph I had already written, and I'm really happy with how it came out. Please, please review with what you liked, what could be improved, and/or any other thoughts. I love you guys! Enjoy!

Jack and Crutchie sat in the back corner of their favorite deli, a place central to almost anywhere in Lower Manhattan. They would come, talk, and just watch the people. They ordered what they could afford, which was sometimes just a free cup of water, and relaxed. This was one of those times.

"Hey Jack?" They had been eavesdropping on two guys laughing and flirting back and forth. They were lost in each other's eyes, truly soul mates. When Crutchie spoke, he spoke with an uncertainty about him that made Jack go soft.

"What's up bud?"

"I want ta talk about it."

"For sure?" Jack knew what Crutchie meant.

"Yeah, yeah I think so."

"As long as you're okay."

"Um, when it happened, it was like he was trying to break in a glove. Consistently working on me every day. He just kept beating me until I broke. Mentally, and physically. I had tried to fight back, ya know, kicking, yelling. One day he just got sick of my struggling against him. He took what had given me comfort in these horrible times. My ability to run, my freedom to move without limits, all crushed along with my leg."

"Thank you for opening up and letting me in. You're stronger than I will ever be for that. No matter how many stories I hear from kids who have been abused, it still shakes and baffles me how anyone could do this to others and think it's ok." Jack shook with suppressed anger.

Crutchie looked at his feet.

"Hey, why are you tellin' me this now?"

"I jest thought someone oughta know in case…"

"Crutchie?" Jack's voice wavered, filled to the brim with concern and fear.

"In case somethin' were to happen to me again."

"Crutch, if you're _that_ terrified to go home, _that_ scared something will happen, please come stay at the lodge with me and the boys. _Please_ do not go to your house tonight. I will keep you safe. No one will get near you so long as I'm alive."

"I can't, Jack. You know I can't."

Exasperated, Jack frantically tried to come up with a plan. Anything to keep Crutchie safe. "Yes you can! If ya just never go back there-"

"He'd come lookin' for me. You's said it yourself! We's a family, I'm not putting you in danger." Jack usually was the one saying this whenever he tried to reason with his brothers. Crutchie was desperate for him to see the situation in a reasonable light.

"But-" Jack wasn't used to getting shut down, but deep down he knew Crutchie was right. He knew someone had to snap for things to ever reach an end. They couldn't just run away.

"Jack, listen to me! It wouldn't just be you. Think about all the other boys in the lodge. You said it yourself, I'm just a project to him. Think about what would happen if he showed up lookin' and couldn't find me. He'd move on to someone else. Think about if he showed up drunk on top of all that. Are you really willing to put Romeo at risk? Elmer? Smalls?"

In the smallest voice Crutchie had ever heard out of him, Jack said, "I know. But, Crutch, we don't trade lives. We'll make it." Jack covered his face and spoke through his hands. "I can't believe I'm letting you go back."

"I know." Crutchie took a breath. "I love ya too."


	10. Chapter 10

/ Y'all I am so sorry I have not updated in so long. I know it is frustrating when someone just stops updating a story with no explanation. Between starting high school, running track, and being busy with soccer (I got my first recruitment letter from a university yesterday!), I haven't had the time to create a quality chapter I felt good publishing. It has been my pleasure going on this journey with you guys and the kind reviews that have been posted truly filled my heart with joy and reassurance. All this to say, I hope y'all can forgive me and enjoy this _last_ chapter of Something's Missing. Thank you.

Crutchie walked in, mouth slightly agape and eyes wide as if he was seeing everything and nothing at the same time.

"Are you a'ight?" Jack asked this question every day, but this time was different. Jack was genuinely confused and concerned by the expression on the kid's face.

"He's gone." The simple statement that could mean so much.

 _Did Crutchie snap? Should they start hiding from the bulls, again? Did the man just up and leave? What, Crutchie, what?_ "Gone…?"

"Gone. Dead. In Hell where he belongs. I went back to the house afta school yesterday and he had gone and drank himself to death. Beer and whiskey bottles coverin' the ground… Just gone." A small smile hinted on Crutchie's face before being replaced again with a furrowed brow. "I'm an orphan," he said, his voice cracking.

"Ya already were. Providing for yourself, protecting yourself. That man was not your parent or guardian or dad."

"He may not have been my dad, but like it or not he was my father. The worst part is he wasn't always like that. I want to despise him. I want to feel _no_ sympathy and _no_ love towards him. But then I think back to when things were better. When we would go out to the pier and just watch the sun set. As a fam'ly."

"You cannot make excuses for him. The man nearly beat you to death. Crutch, my mudda used to do the same thing when I was younger. She'd say she deserved the horrible things Pa did to her." Jack took a shaky breath. He'd _never_ talked about his family before, everyone just knew not to ask.

"Jack, ya really don't have to. I know-" He was cut off.

"I need to. I'm done blocking it out, pretending my life's normal." Jack took another breath. "He broke her until she just couldn't put on that pitiful smile and tell me everything was okay. When he finished with her, he moved onto me. They are cruel. They see us as just another project, another challenge. Crutchie, _don't_ forgive him. _Don't_ convince yourself that it's normal. I couldn't bare to see that smile wiped off of your luminescent face." A tear slid down his cheek.

Crutchie silently nodded. "Thank you," he whispered.

"Come with me. Come live somewhere you can call a home, not a house. With people who are ya family, not your captors. See this as a new start where you don't have to hide or cower. You are safe now."

Jack and Crutchie embraced so tight and full of love that their broken pieces finally got a little closer to fitting back together. They stayed there for what felt like an eternity, for once not caring who saw the exchange. They knew that Crutchie's life wouldn't be a 180 degree turn. While the physical threat was gone, the experience would haunt him for too long. Nightmares would consume his nights for too long. Shadows in the allies would cause him to tense up for too long. Crutchie would never get to have the same life he once did. He may never be able to run and get his PRs back. But within this hug, Crutchie knew that Jack would be there for him through it all. He would be ok.


End file.
